Aja's Serenity

Have you ever had a day that went completely the way you had imagined it?  I don't think I ever had, but for those who have, I'm overjoyed with the fact that at least someone got to have a special day as such. As young girls, we are taught stories where a man saves us and we live happily ever after. But that story that we ever so often tell is destructive in its own self. I too have fallen for that story the one where you fall in love with a Prince of a faraway country, travel the world, get married, become a princess, have children, and live happily ever after.  Like I've said before this is definitely a story we've all heard before. But what happens when that fairy tale doesn't come to fruition. What then, your left totally shattered trying to make sense of the life that you made up for yourself. Was it even possible at all? Could I have actually succeeded? Catch the prince's eyes, marry him and become a princess. Could it all have happened? Maybe the impossib...

What do you say to a broken girl A child that's laying silently on the floor  Do you watch her express her pain or run to her rescue  She doesn't need saving, just needs someone that will stay through the pain  She's shackled, broken, and torn You can't see what she feels, only hears her silent groans Her agony is self-reliant on the things you say She needs constant clarification, she craves the knowledge of your need and appreciation for her  She needs love and not a fraction of it She needs stability and not broken promises  She needs help but she can't be fixed Or so she thinks  So I ask again do you rescue her or watch her break  Do you lend your hand and wipe her tears away Do you tell her sweet nothings to ease her pain Do you distract her from the case that separates Do you stare, confused and unaware?  She's too scared to take your hand Scared that once she gives in you will let go of her  You will inevitably let go No one really can...

The girl that cries alone looks out her window dreaming of a world where she's whole. A world with sunshine and rainbows. A perfect world that should not, could not, and would not exist. She liked the rain, why? Because she and the rain had something in common, the rain sheds tears and so does she. She's not perfect but let's be honest none of us are. She sees and knows her flaws and the rain knows his too. His tears are glorified because after a rainbow appears. After a storm there's calm. This girl sees no seize of her sufferings; they just seem to continue and multiply. Does the rain truly become destruction, if after its wrath there's light? Bright colors pigment the sky. It's not raining outside today if it were, you would find the girl outside soaking up the rain. She likes the rain. Because the rain has a continuous cycle it never stops happening, but it does. Kind of like her. The rain can't judge her because they're the same. The rain's bold...

She knows she's surrounded by darkness, she knows she's alone, she knows she's unwanted, she knows she's unloved, she knows she'll never be good enough, she knows, she knows, she knows. Have you ever seen her smile or heard her laughter, if yes then you know how difficult it was for her to allow you to hear and see it. She doesn't laugh for everyone.  She doesn't smile for everyone. Even though she has a "crew"  she's still alone. They don't know her any more than she does. She doesn't know who she is and they will never know. They just think they do but they don't. She lives in the darkness, only on a few rare occasions, she allows the light in. She doesn't have much to say but has a lot to say. She wants to speak and be heard. She wants to be accepted in a world where glamour is top-tier. She doesn't want to look like anyone else. She doesn't want to be like anyone else, she just has no one to be like but herself. She...